Don't worry, you're not missing out!

*Originally published on December 17, 2020:

Now that the holiday season is in full swing, we wanted to take a moment to shed some not-so-great light (pun intended) on various and beloved holiday attractions throughout The District. This is not to say we don't enjoy these attractions—we truly do love them all—but that doesn't mean everyone else does ...

According to Yelp, some of the most loved and cherished holiday attractions aren't what they're cracked up to be. (We beg to differ!) But, to hopefully cheer you up and at least make you smile a little bit, we've collected some of the most hilarious negative reviews for DC's holiday attractions.

So what's the verdict? The National Christmas Tree isn't worth it. The snacks at Zoo Lights are going downhil. And for the love of all that is holy, don't go to the National Cathedral. Let's dive in, shall we?

Let's start off with Zoo Lights, whose problems seem to lie in the concessions department:

• "The quality of cookies has decreased considerably the last two years."

But wait, it gets worse:

• "the $3 8oz cup of hot chocolate tasted like it had just enough cocoa mix in it to not be called water."

Courtesy of thenationaltree.org

Then there's the National Christmas Tree, which appears to live up to the Mona Lisa standard of cruel disappointments:

• "It's a glitzy small non tree with a bunch of smaller trees haphazardly strewn about in a muddy field with a metal gangplank going around it. The train was kinda cool."

To be honest, when is a train not cool?

The Mormon Temple in Kensington is a welcome sight to behold on the Beltway. For some:

• "It pops out of nowhere and scares the hell out of you."

(We're screaming.)

Courtesy of Washington National Cathedral (Facebook)

The Washington National Cathedral is an architectural marvel known for its uplifting Christmas services. It's also huge and easy to get lost in. Spiritually and literally. But not everybody's impressed:

• "I would rather have been chatted up by a burning bush and swallowed by a whale than spend another minute in the National Cathedral."

One person at Sixth & I Synagogue has had it up to here with the rules:

• "Just tonight they told me I couldn't attend with my knitting even though I have attended many many events there with my knitting."

First, it's knitting, then it's sitting. What next? The slippery slope is real!

And if you thought people's ire couldn't touch The Kennedy Center:

• "Stop funding crony, corrupt activities like arts and crafts."

Have you visited these holiday landmarks before? Did they meet your expectations? Tell us in the comments!