It's February, and let's face it: 'tis the season for emotional stress.
The joy of the holidays has officially receded, stress of work is setting in, and you're finally remembering all the things you hate about that partner you found for cuffing season. So if you need to weep and/or shriek into the void, which is a necessary ritual for sustaining in form, here are the best places in Richmond to do it.
1. Hollywood Cemetery
Courtesy of E. Alvin
Everyone around you is dead. Presidents? Tragic. American Civil War? A time of turmoil. Is that a statue of a dog? Dogs don't deserve death. Everything is wrong.
The dead will join you in your festival of tears, and Lord Voldemort may or may not get reincarnated—I cannot attest as to what happens in that terrifying place at 3 a.m.
2. The VMFA
Courtesy of Virginia Museum of Fine Arts
Artists are always weeping profusely. There are also lots of vastly chamberous spaces where you are surrounded by very important relics that should be evoking more emotion than they do. The Ancient Egyptian Art Collection is a good one.
3. The Edgar Allan Poe Museum
Courtesy of Berks History Center
Dude, it's Edgar Allan Poe.
Courtesy of Brightest Young Things
A place full of angst, GWARbar is where angst goes to breed, simmer, and multiply into a commercially viable take on itself. The back porch is full of kids in graphic tees passive-aggressively smoking cigarettes like it's 1992, so honestly, no one will think twice. You might even get some respect and an acknowledgment from a stranger: "The world is b*******, man."
5. The Local
Courtesy of Visit Richmond/Richmond Region Tourism
Everyone in there looks like they want to cry but just can't. Be their emotional crucifix. A sacrificial lamb, of sorts.
6. VCU Library
Courtesy of VCU
You have "exams."
7. Your Roommate's Closet
Courtesy of 123RF
Why are you in there? That's a big metaphor for your life, man. Why do we do anything? Literally, what even is consciousness, you know? Exhausting. That's what.
8. An Uber
Courtesy of The Points Guy
Pay someone to listen to you talk about your life. Uber: the Poor Man's Therapy.
9. Cary Street
Courtesy of The Conversation
If you're feeling masochistic, there is no better place to go be judged for literally anything like the piece of trash you are.
10. In the Arms of a Stranger You Met on the Internet
Courtesy of Mattia Maria Scivoletto
Tinder: the Poor Man's Wife and 2.5 Kids.
11. Your Doctor's Office
Courtesy of NBC
It's okay to feel sad sometimes, and you will not feel this way forever.
12. Your Friend's Apartment
Courtesy of Shutterstock
Because life is better not alone, and as much as we can angst and wish, alone is something we cannot possibly be. It's a flaw of existence. We're here with each other. And joy, as well as burdens, are meant to be shared.
Think that was kind of cheesy? Same! Most of my content is more clever and cynical. I am an infinite fountain of aphorisms and wit. Postpone your inevitable confrontation with the void by browsing more mild content on our site. You can do this. And in the meantime, enjoy this golden age of creative content. This writer is not a slogan nor a voice from the void. She hears you, and she is also here.
Now go cry, if you have to. It feels all right.