Would you rather eat ketchup- or salad-flavored ice cream? Well, good news. You can have both!

Heinz, the barons of beans and kaisers of ketchup, seem to have embraced "absurdity" as the flavor of the summer. That flavor comes to you in the eldritch form of Heanz Creamz, a line of ice cream flavors based on sauces and condiments made by Heinz. 

Though it sounds like a joke, you really can experience mayonnaise or ketchup ice cream flavors. However, you can't just buy them in cartons at the store—that luxury seems reserved for brave food journalists. For the rest of us, we have to prove we really want to suffer and order DIY flavor kits from the Heinz to Home online store. 

Each kit costs £15 (or $18.91 for this side of the pond) and includes the sauce, a golden scoop, and golden spoon, a reusable branded ice cream tub, and the recipe for the foul concoction. Unfortunately, or perhaps mercifully, there is no sample platter for all of the flavors, and if you really want to try them all, you'll have to commit to multiple kits.

The Flavors

Which one of these sounds the worst? 

Courtesy Heinz

• Heinz Ketchup Creamz

Enjoy the unmistakable taste of your favourite Heinz Tomato Ketchup—in a Heinz Creamz! Whip up this surprising sweet treat, laced with all the tomatoey goodness of a squeeze of ketchup.

• Heinz Mayo Creamz

This sweet treat is [seriously] good! The smooth and creamy taste of Heinz [Seriously] Good Mayonnaise whipped into a delicious ice cream. 

• Heinz Salad Creamz

The tangy taste of Heinz Salad Cream makes it one of Britain’s best loved sauces and now it’s a Heinz Creamz. 

• Heinz BBQ Creamz

It’s sweet, sticky and tongue-tinglingly delicious. The smoky mouth-watering flavour of Heinz Classic Barbecue sauce, in a Heinz Creamz. 

• Heinz Saucy Sauce Creamz

The curiously delicious Heinz Saucy Sauce is the perfect flavour blend of Heinz Tomato Ketchup and Heinz [Seriously] Good Mayonnaise in one delicious bottle. 

Sound Good?

Each recipe comes with a recommended topping, from merengue to basil pesto to bacon bits. The Ketchup Creamz even has a vegan option. Although, as of writing, the Ketchup option was sold out.

Heinz insists that the process of making the ice cream is simple and takes only 15 minutes (not counting freezing time) and they've also put free recipes for the Creamz on their site so you can craft the abominations with your own sauce reserves.

If you're hoping to buy some and, in your hubris, think it will be delicious, just be cautioned that critics and people with tastebuds describe it as "wrong," "nothing redeeming," or "a crime."

Don't say we didn't warn you.

What flavor repels you most powerfully? Has Heinz gone mad, or is this a decent marketing ploy? 

Comment below and let us know!